Oct 262009
 

You thought you escaped. You thought they would never return. You thought that Landon dude had forgotten to do the sequel to that horrifying Pokemon kiddie toy review. Your hopes and dreams have been crushed, as the Pokemon Cheebees return in full force. Cower in fear as these adorable atrocities show you that there is no god, that your parents never loved you, and that toys can destroy your soul. Or whatever.

Not much to say about these little dudes, overall, that I haven’t covered in the last review. I will say that I like the overall design of the Cheebee body. I like the emphasis on the head and face that’s created by the head being considerably larger than the body proper. While you can do a lot with properly proportioned bodies, making the head larger leads to the face being a bit more expressive, in order to compensate for a possible lack of detail in the body. It’s a neat creative “crutch,” so to speak. Hardly unique when it comes to these sorts of figures, but still worth noting.

Pachiritsu is something of a Pod-Pokemon. She takes everything that made Pikachu a lovable, adorable hit with the kiddies and turns it into something identical and thoroughly evil. She’s something of a corporate-made cutesy Frankenstein, cloned and assembled from so many discarded Pikachus, to create the next generation of hyper-cute mascot merchandise.

Much like Munchlax, Pachiritsu looks like her actual pokecarnation. She has a squirrely little body, hugely cute head, and a bushy tail. A very accurate likeness when you consider that these vinyl toys tend to be exaggerations. She blends in with the crowd all too well, not unlike some sort of government pokeagent trying to hide in plain sight. She’s probably a turncoat from the Poketariat trying to assassinate their leader, Pikachu, in order to keep the Pokeminati in power. Can’t trust those normals.

Pachiritsu has much of the same “articulation” as Pikachu. Her head and tail can make complete 360 degree turns, which really doesn’t amount too much when you get down to it. Also, while her ears are separate pieces like Pikachu’s, since their bases are considerably wider all you can really do is wiggle them. Not even a modicum of posing is possible.

When you get down to it, Pachiritsu is cute and is a great representation of the Pokemon in question, but she really isn’t all that. She covers a niche that Pikachu already claims, and she doesn’t really bring much else to the table. I guess if you were a kid whose first experience with Pokemon was the new Diamond and Pearl run, you might dig her. And maybe you could look at her as the Batgirl or Supergirl to Pikachu’s Batman or Superman. Then again, Pikachu’s gender has always been fairly ambiguous, so that comparison probably doesn’t work, and it’s a backhanded compliment at best.

 Still, Pachiritsu’s cooler than that chipmunk girl from Sacred Blacksmith. Pachi won’t have to resort to indian casino floor shows like Lisa will when she joins the Chipettes on their next tour. Buck teeth isn’t always a damning factor.

Croagunk. King of the Brock Cock Block. You do your service to control the pet population by poison punch neutering that horndog before he can spread his seed amongst the Jennys and Joys of the world. He’s like unto a Pokemon Bob Barker. He totally needs to host his own game show.

Croagunk is one of my all-time favorite Pokemon. He’s right up there with Jigglypuff and Psyduck. I dig his yakuza punk like posture. I dig how he manhandles Brock when his libido gets the best of him. I love his scrappy fighting style. He rocks the proverbial Casbah. He also has a great character design when it comes to his Cheebee. The Cheebee design forces the designers to focus on Croagunk’s head. Since his head was one of his smaller features, his lanky body being the bulk of hs actual design, th focus had to be shifted to some other details.

This results in Croagunk’s awesomely huge frog cheeks. More so than any of the other Pokemon Cheebees, this exaggeration nails the character’s look. By taking this particular liberty with Croagunk’s design, the designers have made him look more like the intended character than if they had gone with a more subdued painted-on look. This is such an awesome design choice that I have absolutely no desire to make a snarky, cynical comment in this paragraph.

The rest of Croagunk’s look is perfect a well. The paint job on his face nails his disdainful eyes, and while he may look a bit too happy with that wide smile, that happy face fits well with the overall Cheebee vibe. You can be perplexed like Munchlax, but Croagunk’s usual apathetic loo wouldn’t quite jibe. I also dig how they accentuate the bandage-like patterns on his chest. It captures that street ruffian look of his while still being damn cute.

Cheebees are awesome. I’d argue that they’re the best pseudo-designer toys I’ve seen on the market. And this is coming from someone who adored the Mighty Mugg line before it went all but extinct. I hope they stick with these little dudes.

The same scores from my previous review stand, although I’d give Croagunk a full-on 5. He rocks that much.

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