The Creeping Nostalgia

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Apr 162012
 

I’ve probably talked about this before. When I was a kid, I had a long series of dreams where otherworldly forces were hunting me. These dreams really stuck with me since they were pretty damn vivid and they inspired me so much that I put them to paper. If anything, these dreams pushed me to pursue writing, thus defining a lot of what I like to do. Like, y’know, blogging and stuff.

All the shit that’s going down in Nyarlko is harkening back to a lot of the stuff that went down in these dreams.

The dream that really stuck with me was one of the first. In the dream I was moving into a new house. My parents had left our TV in the entry hall to the house. The TV wasn’t plugged in, but when I opened the door the TV turned on by itself. I didn’t think much of it at the time, since the TV was on HBO. The show started with a board meeting of sorts. People were sitting around a meeting table discussing things. The conversation soon turned to some evil stuff. Taking of the world. Killing people. Nasty stuff.

Then I finally realized that the “people” sitting around the table were monsters. I remember them appearing distinctly Muppet-like– the sort of intricate creepy puppets you’d see in, say, The Dark Crystal or that Jim Henson’s Storytellers TV series. And once I realized what was happening, the monster at the end of the table looked right at me and said something along the lines of “And you know about that kid Landon? We have to kill him too!”

The monsters poured out of the TV and chased after me. I ran into my parents’ room, but the monsters were already there. And of course, now that I was trapped, I forced myself awake.

It freaked me out not so much because monsters wanted to kill me but because it was personal. I was chosen by these monsters to be their target. I wasn’t just some random kid that got in the way of a nasty monster. It wasn’t just a matter of the traditional monster in the closet/under the bed who eats children indiscriminately. I was scared because there was something about me that made me wanted by these creatures. In all of these dreams, I would never know why I was chosen. I just knew that only I would satiate these creatures’ desires.

That’s pretty much the same situation as in Nyarlko. Mahiru’s chosen by these Elder Gods to be their plaything. We don’t know why. Yeah, sure, Nodens wanted Mahiru to be his reality TV show plaything, but that’s just the end result, not the reason. Mahiru’s stars are aligned, and there’s no rhyme or reason behind his place in the stars other than the fact that it’s his fate. Combined that existential “why me” angle with all of the freaky Lovecraftian monsters cheering for Mahiru’s torment and this episode was like some dream out of my youth. That scene were Mahiru was bound by Noden’s beard, helpless to the cries and jeers of a colosseum of space creatures, took me right back to my childhood.

I’m so nostalgic for being abused by monsters.