Dec 242012
 

I actually got three decent recommendations for this year’s Secret Santa: Cosmo Police Justy, Dominion Tank Police, and Garzey’s Wing. They’re all things I’ve been meaning to see but hadn’t. I know I’ve seen a little bit of Tank Police back in the day, but never saw the whole thing. I’ve also seen a bit of Aura Battler Dunbine, the series Garzey’s Wing is based on. So, because of that familiarity being in a rush because I had a month-long bout of stupidity and thought Mad Bull 34 was one of my choices, I opted to go with the anime that I knew nothing about was the shortest.

Justy’s a pretty simple OVA. Psychics are running around in some unspecified future sci-fi world. Some of them are cops like Justy, some of them are bad guys of vague alien origin. Because, y’know, bad dudes are always have some blueish grayish skin color in these things. It’s one of those rules determined by the Star Trek Inspiration Accord of 1971. Justy kills these criminal psychics, because that’s probably the only way to stop someone with these kinds of powers. What are you gonna do, lock him up? He’ll just teleport out or mind melt the guards or blow up the prison and fly away. Maybe you could hire a bunch of good guy psychics to put him in psychic shield prison or something, but that’d cost a hell of a lot of space bucks paying enough guys to do this 24-7. Given 8 hour shifts and at least two psychic guards per prisoner to overwhelm his own powers, you’re looking at 6 guards minimum per day, and that’s not taking into account days off and shit. Are there enough psychics in the universe to hire enough people for this potential space psychic prison? And if there are, can the space government afford that kind of budget? I’m sure legit psychics demand some decent pay. I’m sure their unions have considerably leverage against non-psychic employers.

Killing psychic criminals is a far more practical and manageable practice. Might not sit well with the anti-death penalty crowd, but psychics create far more economic demands than regular criminals. Gotta make some moral sacrifices for the greater good, man.

So yeah, Justy killed this one psychic criminal dude in the past, and he had a psychic daughter. Thing is, Justy upped and killed the daddy in front of said daughter, and she snapped and went all Dark Phoenix. She even psychically aged so she could fulfill her vow to kill Justy when she  “grew up.” there’s some real dedication to one’s word. But she came to her senses before she went off and blew up alien planets and caught the eye of alien super hero teams and shit, and now she’s taken to Justy as if he were her older brother with whom she wants to get it on, because that’s what non-blood-related siblings do in anime.

This is some weird amalgamation of Starjammers from X-Men and your standard fare “please love me that way, onii-chan *winkwinkfuckme*” anime that are so trendy. Hell, because of that we should see a revival of this property. Those incest lovers would get their fix and the rest of us could get some decent action and stuff.

So Justy has this full-moe faux sister who could kill reality if she had the right sort of temper tantrum. A bunch of evil criminal psychics know this, so they lure her and Justy into a situation where they can use group psychic therapy to make the girl remember that Justy did in her father. She has a relapse and tries to kill Justy. Blahblah he doesn’t die and gets revenge on the baddies by evaporating them and violating their minds and shooting psychic lasers and cool stuff like that. The fights are pretty decent in that they mix up the psychic power tricks. Sometimes someone shoots a laser. Sometimes someone uses telekinesis to mash-up a dude’s spine. Sometimes someone grabs a dude’s face and fries the dude’s brain matter. Sometimes someone drops an abandoned space station of someone’s head. Plenty of psychic kill techniques here.

Yeah, this was a decent little old school OVA. It’s no California Crisis or Vampire Wars, but it’s fun.

Also: It has the little girl cradling the severed legs of her father. It ain’t as good as cradling a decapitated head, but it’ll suffice.

Also Also: Check out my past Secret Santa things: Kaiba and Yami to Boushi to Hon no Tabibito.

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